Wednesday, January 9, 2013

When I think of the little time we have left, my heart is noisy. There is no other way to describe it. It is a mix of emotions, and when I try to write about what I'm feelings, words fail the chaos that is my heart. As we have always said, WAGE. WAGE to describe our friendship. WAGE to describe you. WAGE to encapsulate your beauty. WAGE to sum up what you mean to me. WAGE to even scratch the surface of what we have been to one another.

First of all my love, congratulations on your engagement. No one could be happier than me. I am praying for you. I am praying for your new life with this man. I am so encouraged by the ways  I have seen him push you to grow in grace and nudge your weaknesses. I truly believe that you and he are different in many ways, but these differences compliment one another and bring two people together who have different backgrounds and histories. You have the one similarity that is of any importance: you love Christ. I can't wait to see how you will continue to grow with this man, as a living image of Christ's love for the church. Your relationship preaches the gospel to me. I pray that you two will continue to glorify God throughout your whole lives. There is no other purpose for which we were made.

Secondly, just know that you will be missed. There are so many things I will miss about having you here:
  • I will miss carpooling with you to all church events
  • I will miss our late night talks and movie sessions
  • I will miss spending the Fourth of July with you and watching fireworks with you
  • I will miss watching movies with you
  • I will miss eating ice cream with you
  • I will miss sharing music in the car
  • I will miss being passionate and watching your body language when you get really excited about something
  • I will miss your sweet spirit
  • I will miss your entertaining and hilarious stories that only happen to you
  • I will miss your enthusiasm
  • I will miss the way you really listen to me
  • I will miss the way you teach me how to be a better friend
  • I will miss the way you push me towards Jesus
  • I will miss the way your hugs feel
  • I will miss laughing with you
  • I will miss reminiscing with you on weird things we have done in the past summers
  • I will miss your crazy cars with broken electrical gadgets
  • I will miss hearing about you making cookies
And my heart hurts for selfish reasons. You have been the best friend I have ever had. You have walked with me the longest and you know me the best. We think about the world in the same way. And besides our sisters, I haven't met many who share that with us. I love how we are so different, yet the same mind in two separate bodies. 

But thirdly, I am so excited to see what is in store for you. You are precious to me. And I can see the way that you are now precious to this man. I know that he will love and cherish you. I love that he sees the beautiful things about you that makes you unique. And my prayer is that he will continue to cherish those things that make you so special until the day you die. You are one of the best people that I have ever met. I am so happy for you, and if you are going to have to be away from me, I guess this is the reason that I would choose for the occasion.

Fourthly, I just want to say thank you. There are so many reasons that I am thankful for you, but I will try to just list a few. You are the most faithful and loyal friend I know. I have never worried about you leaving or walking out of my life. I know that I can tell you anything and you will not abandon me. You are understanding. You really seek to feel what others are feeling and embody multiplying others' joys and dividing sorrows. You are the best listener. I know that when I tell you something, you listen to every word and do so because you really want to know - you never listen because you are required to or because I expect you to. You are joyful. You know that we laugh the most together. I mean, come on, you had to take tylenol after coming to my house when we were kids. You are a steadfast follower of Christ. You teach me so much through your example and encouragement. I am thankful that we never have to say goodbye because eternally we are sisters in Him.

You are so dear to me. I don't know how else to close this, than by saying, I am honored to call you my best friend. I am so incredibly thankful to be a part of your life and to have you in mine. I love you more than life. WAGE. 

Friday, December 28, 2012

Songs I Play on Repeat 2012


  1. You Got It Bad/Because of You - Justin Bieber
  2. Payphone - Maroon 5
  3. Come Wake Me Up - Rascal Flatts
  4. We Are Young - Boyce Avenue
  5. Wanted You More - Lady Antebellum
  6. If I Die Young - Justin Robinett and Michael Henry
  7. Never Gonna Leave This Bed - Justin Robinett and Michael Henry
  8. Drunk - Ed Sheeran
  9. Be Alright - Justin Bieber
  10. Kiss Tomorrow Goodbye - Luke Bryan
  11. Drunk on You - Luke Bryan
  12. All Too Well - Taylor Swift
  13. Lego House - Ed Sheeran
  14. Because of You - Ne-yo
  15. Don't Wake Me Up - Chris Brown
  16. Let Me Love You - Ne-yo
  17. Your Hand in Mine - Explosions in the Sky
  18. Angel with a Shotgun - The Cab
  19. Pour Me Out - He is We
  20. Thunder - Katy McAllister
  21. Holocene - Bon Iver
  22. Holocene - Kate McGill 
  23. Small Bump - Ed Sheeran
  24. Give Me Love - Ed Sheeran
  25. Come Wake Me Up - Ed Sheeran
  26. Shadows - David Crowder Band feat. Lecrae
  27. American Secrets - Parachute
  28. Here With You - Asher Monroe
  29. Catch My Breath - Kelly Clarkson



Sunday, December 16, 2012

Winter Break Bucket List


  1. Go to the Festival of Lights and ride the Ferris wheel
  2. Practice portion control and healthy eating
  3. Have a quiet time everyday
  4. Go to Davis's basketball games
  5. Play basketball at Nottaway
  6. Cook something for Christmas dinner
  7. Go to the Eastern Market
  8. See Skyfall
  9. See Rise of the Guardians
  10. Watch Batman Begins
  11. Get new clothes
  12. Go to Passion 2013
  13. Go ice skating
  14. Lose weight
  15. See the lights at Meadowlark
  16. Take a good picture of the four kids
  17. Take lots of pictures
  18. Apply to internships
  19. Get my eyebrows waxed
  20. Get a cute Christmas outfit
  21. Get my hair cut
  22. Enjoy everything that I eat
  23. Love recklessly
  24. Go to the chiropractor
  25. Whiten my teeth
  26. Call and write a letter to Grandma

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Also from the past

Good Things:


  1. Pink Starbursts
  2. Shooting Stars
  3. Twilight
  4. Breezes that make long grasses ripple
  5. Cornfields
  6. Smores
  7. Adrenaline rushes
  8. Challenges
  9. Balloons
  10. Helium
  11. Golden retriever or golden lab puppies
  12. those moments when we’re singing in church and the instruments stop for a chorus and the congregation is singing acapella and it gives you just a taste of how great heaven is going to be
  13. Sunsets
  14. Lakes
  15. Inside jokes
  16. Vulnerability
  17. Quoting movies
  18. Driving with the music blaring and the windows down
  19. The beach
  20. Good novels
  21. Red skittles
  22. Looking through the church bulletin and seeing that there is good music in the service
  23. Swimming at night
  24. Honesty
  25. City landscapes at night when they are lit up and you realize how much planning and effort it took to make the whole city
  26. Bubble gum
  27. Realizing your favorite TV either comes on tonight or that it came on last night and it’s waiting on tivo
  28. Reading what people think about you
  29. Turning in an assignment or exam that you feel really good about
  30. Walking into the house and smelling that something delicious was made
  31. The smell of freshly mowed grass
  32. Hershey’s chocolate
  33. The sound of frogs at night
  34. Fireflies
  35. Eating freshly picked berries
  36. Coming home from a successful shopping trip
  37. Finishing something that you have been dreading doing
  38. The sound of a ball on a baseball bat
  39. Ice cream cones
  40. Handwritten letters
  41. Getting a good grade back on a test or paper
  42. Watching movies for the first time and not knowing what is going to happen
  43. Modern Family
  44. Acoustic music
  45. The smell of a bookstore
  46. Feeling good about your body and weight
  47. Finishing a good book
  48. Endorphins
  49. Old pictures
  50. Music

Friday, December 14, 2012

Wiser in the Past

Sometimes I think I was wiser in the past. I came across this list that I had written two years ago and am struck at how much I need to remind myself of these truths and encouragements daily:



Done
I’m done with viewing relationships in a selfish light.
I’m done with approaching relationships in a consumeristic manner - weighing the pros and cons as to what it will cost be in return for what I can gain.
I’m done with not loving because love is not always reciprocated.
I’m done with thinking about what I deserve and how I should be treated.
I’m done dwelling on the past. It is a part of who I am. It will shape who I am today. The past is in the past. It is over and unchangeable. I will no longer allow it to have that power over me of controlling my actions in the present.
I’m done holding onto the idol of what my relationship with a boy was. That was a relationship - there will never be a relationship like that again, but there doesn’t need to be one like that again. Each relationship takes a different form.
I will:
Love recklessly because Jesus’ love is sufficient.
Invest in people because Jesus has saved me.
View relationships in light of how I can serve and how I can be selfless.
Rest in the fact that I don’t really need others. Jesus is enough.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Thanksgiving List as a 20 year old


  1. Who God is - a good God, full of love and compassion and mercy and sovereignty and grace
  2. My family
  3. My apartment
  4. The basketball team
  5. Reformed University Fellowship
  6. The city of Charlottesville
  7. The interaction between the siblings now that Davis is 13 and Ryan is 22 - we are all moving towards being friends as well as siblings
  8. Adults and older people who have poured into my life (Coach Priester, teachers, AC and Derrick, other MPC volunteers, Saranell, Molly, Libbie, etc.)
  9. Friends, new and old, UVA and nova
  10. Good health for those I love
  11. My bed
  12. The luxury of having a car at school
  13. The opportunity to be invested and welcomed into the Lewis family this summer
  14. Good things to be enjoyed - movies, tv shows, good food, novels, etc. 
  15. The opportunity to attend the University of Virginia
  16. The freedom to choose what I study
  17. Greg Thompson, Shawn Slate, James Forsyth
  18. God's evident power and creativity in nature
  19. Technology allowing me to keep up with people
  20. The ability to exercise